My Son, the Man
This is the sure sign that I am now officially middle-aged. Last night, I caught myself musing on what I have accomplished in my life. I think when God starts hitting the rewind button it's a pretty clear signal you're there. ; ) I've spent most of my life downplaying or not recognizing my accomplishments or crediting someone or something else for my successes. I think it's time I stop that.
As a single mother, I view my son as my crowning acheivement to date. Michael has made me immensely proud on more occasions and in more ways than I could count. His honor, his compassion, his gentleness, his geneosity, his trustworthiness, his intellect, his sensitivity, the way his mind works and the depth of his emotions. I've often felt I could never be more proud of him than at that particular moment, only to be proven wrong over and over. Those are possibly the only times I haven't resented being wrong.
Well, I was wrong again. I think it's finally sunk in that I'm a grandmother and my son and daughter-in-law have a son of their own now. (Happy 13th day birthday, Brendan! Nana loves you! xoxox) When I met Mike outside the hospital on my visit, he looked so haggard...bloodshot, tossled, unkempt...it was just about the most adorable thing I'd ever seen. (So you know, Mike, some other of the most adorable things were you playing with Aunt Lisa & with your friends, "Herm," Superman, "Barbaran" and the time I came home to find you burning Off! off the surface of your grandmother's counter protector. So, maybe you risked burning the house down, but at least you took the risk, dang it! ; )
Mike and I had lunch together (why does driving always make me so hungry?) while Jen showered. (Can you believe they made me wait a whole half-hour in the same building with him before I could meet my grandson? ; ) Mike had been at the hospital ever since he drove Jen there on the day Brendan was born. For him, it was a given that he would remain. "Why would I have been home yet, Mom? We're still here." He slept in a recliner and between the two of them they hadn't had more than one full night's sleep in the two or three nights prior.
Of course, it was love-at-first-sight with Brendan. But, do you know what my favorite pictures from my visit are? (Well, beside the adorable picture with Brendan's head in my hand!) They are the pics of Mike, Jen and Brendan. This picture of the happy, new family. They are the picture of my son in his new role and brand-spanking new life.
Michael is protective. Jen and I have brushed up against each other in the past. Fortunately, over the past couple of years, Jen has gotten to the point where something I will do or say will piss her off rather than hurt her feelings. I hope we someday get to the point of Jen telling me off when that happens. I think we will someday. I love you, Jen.
The thing that has made me most proud of my son has been the way he's 'protected' his wife and his family. He acted as intermediary between Jen and I when she was pregnant and my apparent insensitivity bruised or angered her even more than usual. I am proud of the way he takes ownership of his son and his family in the most natural way. I'm proud that the two of them were changing messy diapers as a team. I'm even proud that they have a prohibition on visits until they have settled in a bit as a family.
(Just remember, Mike and Jen...I'm ready at any time and eager as can be to play with my grandboy. I'd also make an excellent babysitter, if you two wanted to go get dinner alone or something! Services available freely, with appropriate notice. It is a five-hour drive, after all! ; )
He has shifted allegiance, my son. He hasn't shifted love. There's plenty of that to go around and I get my share. But his alliance is now firmly with his family, as it should be. This fills me with love and joy and fills my heart to bursting with pride.
In the last year, I've watched my son become a man. And he's a man I respect and honor. I couldn't be more proud!
There are plenty of other things I've accomplished in my life, of which I am proud. This is just the tip of the iceberg.
As a single mother, I view my son as my crowning acheivement to date. Michael has made me immensely proud on more occasions and in more ways than I could count. His honor, his compassion, his gentleness, his geneosity, his trustworthiness, his intellect, his sensitivity, the way his mind works and the depth of his emotions. I've often felt I could never be more proud of him than at that particular moment, only to be proven wrong over and over. Those are possibly the only times I haven't resented being wrong.
Well, I was wrong again. I think it's finally sunk in that I'm a grandmother and my son and daughter-in-law have a son of their own now. (Happy 13th day birthday, Brendan! Nana loves you! xoxox) When I met Mike outside the hospital on my visit, he looked so haggard...bloodshot, tossled, unkempt...it was just about the most adorable thing I'd ever seen. (So you know, Mike, some other of the most adorable things were you playing with Aunt Lisa & with your friends, "Herm," Superman, "Barbaran" and the time I came home to find you burning Off! off the surface of your grandmother's counter protector. So, maybe you risked burning the house down, but at least you took the risk, dang it! ; )
Mike and I had lunch together (why does driving always make me so hungry?) while Jen showered. (Can you believe they made me wait a whole half-hour in the same building with him before I could meet my grandson? ; ) Mike had been at the hospital ever since he drove Jen there on the day Brendan was born. For him, it was a given that he would remain. "Why would I have been home yet, Mom? We're still here." He slept in a recliner and between the two of them they hadn't had more than one full night's sleep in the two or three nights prior.
Of course, it was love-at-first-sight with Brendan. But, do you know what my favorite pictures from my visit are? (Well, beside the adorable picture with Brendan's head in my hand!) They are the pics of Mike, Jen and Brendan. This picture of the happy, new family. They are the picture of my son in his new role and brand-spanking new life.Michael is protective. Jen and I have brushed up against each other in the past. Fortunately, over the past couple of years, Jen has gotten to the point where something I will do or say will piss her off rather than hurt her feelings. I hope we someday get to the point of Jen telling me off when that happens. I think we will someday. I love you, Jen.
The thing that has made me most proud of my son has been the way he's 'protected' his wife and his family. He acted as intermediary between Jen and I when she was pregnant and my apparent insensitivity bruised or angered her even more than usual. I am proud of the way he takes ownership of his son and his family in the most natural way. I'm proud that the two of them were changing messy diapers as a team. I'm even proud that they have a prohibition on visits until they have settled in a bit as a family.
(Just remember, Mike and Jen...I'm ready at any time and eager as can be to play with my grandboy. I'd also make an excellent babysitter, if you two wanted to go get dinner alone or something! Services available freely, with appropriate notice. It is a five-hour drive, after all! ; )
He has shifted allegiance, my son. He hasn't shifted love. There's plenty of that to go around and I get my share. But his alliance is now firmly with his family, as it should be. This fills me with love and joy and fills my heart to bursting with pride.
In the last year, I've watched my son become a man. And he's a man I respect and honor. I couldn't be more proud!
There are plenty of other things I've accomplished in my life, of which I am proud. This is just the tip of the iceberg.
posted by Cheryl at
4/23/2006 01:25:00 AM
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