MadMom and Mutt

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Cakes and Silverware

I decided I was hungry before I headed off to bed. So I'm sitting here right now eating a big piece of cake from the local bakery. They make a fabulous cake, so moist there are hardly any crumbs and with a delectable butter cream icing. Sorry, but the newer whipped cream icings do nothing for me. I like my whipped cream on strawberries or Jell-O or ice cream sundaes. It has other uses (NOT huffing! Stupid idea, kids!) which will be reserved for another post, another time, maybe another blog. (Here's where I've been spending a lot of my time recently, if you haven't been there yet.)

I have my father and his side of the family to thank for my amazingly wonderful metabolism. I don't look like a movie star but I don't weigh nearly as much as I should for a woman who likes to eat as I do. Let's just hope my great metabolism doesn't translate itself into hyperthyroidism, as it did for Dad.

I'd like it to be known I feel a pang of remorse as I consume a huge piece of calorie and carb-loaded cake for those women who couldn't look at a piece of cake without gaining two or three pounds. It's this remorse, I think, that dictates my choice of forks. I always choose a small, dessert fork for a prize like this. I eat slowly as a rule and the smaller utensil magnifies that, providing smaller bites. (I have a suspicion that two other factors play important roles in my metabolism...that I do eat slowly. I'm usually the last one done at a dinner table. And that I drink a lot of water every day. I drink between a half-gallon or so on a working day and near or over a gallon when I'm off...more with strenuous physical activity.)

I'm getting to the end, the nitty gritty, as I scoop up any crumbs with the icing that's stuck to the Saran wrap. Somehow, the choice of a smaller piece of flatware seems to make it better. I don't know if it makes women who are more prone to easy weight gain feel any better but for me, it helps ameliorate, a tad, my choice to eat the way I do and not weigh 300 pounds. Please accept my sincere apologies for my diet and metabolism. If it makes you feel any better, I'll probably develop heart disease or emphysema in my 60's, between the diet and the smoking.

But, tonight, I very much enjoyed a large piece of bakery cake with a tall, frothy glass of cold 1% milkfat milk. It was wonderful...and now it's time for bed!

Life is good!

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